How are you managing your stress right now?

My friends have been telling me how worried they are and that the stress of the possibility of losing jobs and being in lockdown is really getting to them. We haven’t been put in lockdown yet in Australia in case you are wondering. So this morning I decided to do the @biddytarot How to Manage Stress spread.

How to Manage Stress Spread
Cards Left to Right
1. What is at the heart of our stress? King of Swords
2. How can we better manage this stress? Queen of Pentacles
3. Where can we better direct our energy? Queen of Swords
4. What self love actions can we take now? King of Wands

Obviously at the moment COVID-19 is at the heart of most of our stress. The King of Swords reminds us to use our intelligence in this situation. We have all heard from people in authority that we need to wash our hands, distance ourselves from social activity, listen for updates as businesses close, only go where you need to, do not travel overseas, self isolate if you have been overseas, seek medical attention if you have any symptoms etc. It is a time to listen and to follow instructions, not only to protect yourself but to protect others who are at higher risk if they contract COVID-19.

The Queen of Pentacles reminds us to stay grounded, try to keep calm, practice that meditation you’ve been meaning to do. Catch up on your favorite shows. Take a bath in your favorite scented oils. Don’t cause yourself anymore anxiety by watching and checking for updates every 5 minutes.

The Queen of Swords is all about organizing, getting things done. Well I guess the possibility of being at home from work or working from home is going to give us extra hours in the day to get shit done around the house. Go through your wardrobe ( I personally have been meaning to do this for months) bag up clothing you no longer need, take it to the collection bins (take hand sanitizer with you), if you have kids show them how to do things around the house (things they’ll be thankful for when they leave home), do some maintenance on the car, get those weights and exercise gear out that have never been used. Organize the garage. And most of all direct your energy towards having better relationships with your family, friends and flatmates.

The King of Wands tells us to remember what we are passionate about and start up those lost hobbies we used to love doing but could never find the time. Start a new project, study something you are interested in online, read those books your got collecting dust on the shelf, become your own Boss.

We are all going through a huge change right now, no matter where we live in the world we are all going through this. Be patient and kind to others and don’t be greedy or selfish, only buy products from the supermarket you will need for a few days. Try not to waste things, find new recipes or make up your own. We will all get through this. Do not hesitate to ask for help if you need it and check up on your friends and family, especially those who live alone.


My First Tarot Reading…

Last week I did my first tarot reading for a complete stranger. It was nerve racking to say the least, but even though I am a total novice, I wanted to see if my intuition was serving me well. In other words I didn’t trust myself or my intuition. I also wanted to test what I had learned about the Tarot Cards and see if I could string a story together.

So, it all started one morning when I was texting a very close friend and I asked her if she knew anyone who would like a free reading. She text me back saying she knew just the person. I gave her my email address and within an hour I had my first client (paying with a review).

When I opened the email I found my very first question, “When am I going to meet my soulmate?” I thought back to every story I’d heard from professional Tarot Readers and they all say this is the most popular question they get. I had to think about a different way to ask the question because I’m not comfortable telling people dates. So I asked the querent if this question worked for them “What does (name) need to know in order to find someone to share her life with?” She was fine with that.

I set up my Tarot reading space, did a little meditation and shuffled the cards while asking the all important question. I took three cards from the top of the deck and laid them out under my crystals. These are the cards that came up:

Seven of wands, Judgement, Eight of wands
Smith-Waite Tarot

When I started writing I was a little unsure of how I was interpreting the cards. I took my time looking at each card and listened to my intuition and wrote and wrote and wrote… I was pleased with the final outcome so I pressed send and waited for my clients response. It was a long wait, but totally worth it. My client was so happy with what I said, she was surprised how accurate I was with some of her past issues. I’m so pleased 😊.

I’m curious to know how others would read/interpret this spread. If you are a Tarot reader novice-professional please leave your take on these cards in the comments below.


Intentions for March…

Monthly Intentions Spread @biddytarot

In the past 3 months I’ve been doing some serious soul searching and discovering what does and doesn’t work for me. For instance I now know that I need physical reminders to help me dig deep inside myself for my truth. Take the Tarot, I used to think these cards were evil and could tell you the future ( Satan would work through the reader). But since reading about and studying the art of Tarot myself, I’ve learned that each card has a meaning that corresponds with something in my life and I can pick a card and use it as a reminder to spend more time on myself, show more care towards others, take better care of my health, find my highest self. They make me think more deeply about things in my past and how I can use my past to move forward and also they remind me to learn from my mistakes and to let go of the things that hold me back. The cards don’t tell me who, what, where and how, they tell me that all I need is inside me by the meaning of the card giving me ideas on what I can work on in my life.

So far, every card I have chosen from the Tarot deck has clarified what I already know. In fact everything I’ve written on this blog this year has the same theme. In order for me to experience transformation, I need to forgive and let go. And all the tools I need for that are right inside me. And my intuition is my strength.

The Tarot spread above is a Monthly Intentions Spread I found on @biddytarot on Instagram.

Think of your intentions for the month coming up. Then the cards from left to right:

1. What worked in the past month?

2. What didn’t?

3. What have I learned?

4. What is the theme for the month?

For the next 3 cards set your intentions and see if the cards match your intentions.

My cards reminded me how far I’ve come this year in learning new skills, loving myself and learning to let go of beliefs that no longer serve me.

I believe that releasing and letting go is a big theme for everyone as the collective this year.

If you love Tarot, try out this spread and let me know what theme you end up with and if it resonates with you.



Angel Cards
Serenity: You are moving into a time of greater inner peace and tranquility. Healing with the Angels Oracle Cards by Doreen Virtue. Ph.D.

A dear friend of mine gave me a set of Angel Cards as a gift, the first thought I had was how pretty they are and I couldn’t wait to have a look at them and see what the Angels had to say.

Lately, I have been feeling quite strange about my life and my relationship and frankly my self. I have been really quite numb about everything, nothing has been bringing me much joy except sleep.  When my friend gave me these Angel Cards it was like a light switching on in my heart and I was excited to get home and ask a question.

Before I tell you what my question was, let me explain how I use the cards. First and foremost the cards do not tell me how to live my life.  The cards are there to remind me of things I need to see in myself, things I need to remember to let go because they no longer serve me. The cards don’t say “You have to let go of the trauma your ex caused you.”  The cards will say “Surrender and Release”, this reminds me to let go and allow God/Angels/Source/Gaia/Mother Nature/Universe (whatever you call the higher powers) to help you release the old so that it can be replaced by something better.  So I do not rely on the cards to tell me my future, I work on my present.

So back to the question I asked, it might sound silly to you but I asked the Universe “How can I love my partner the best way?” while shuffling the Angel Cards, then I took the top card from the deck and turned over Serenity. To be honest at first I thought that’s silly how do I love my partner with serenity?  But when I read the little explanation in the booklet it made complete sense.  It starts with Peace of mind means feeling secure, and knowing you’re always provided for.  It goes on to say more, but I found my answer in these words, in order to love my partner in the best way, I have to love myself in the best way, peace of mind is within me and once I love myself and feel secure in myself, the best love for my partner will flow freely for him. I have to stop worrying that I am not loving him correctly.

So on with the continuous journey of inner work, self love and self discovery.

It’s all love after all…







Lately I’ve been practicing my breathing trying to breathe deeply in and out, expelling as much air as what I take in. With each breath in I slow it down and fill up my lungs and belly. With each breath out I push all the negative energy out.

I find myself using this practice quite a few times a day when I start to feel nervous or anxious about something. Usually, I remind myself that I’ve overcome many difficult situations in the past and I’m strong enough to overcome more. There are other times where it’s not about overcoming something it’s just about breathing and telling my inner voice to be quiet.

For instance, the other day I went in the sail boat with my boyfriend on the Broadwater at the Gold Coast. Now I’m not talking about a boat with space to move, I’m talking about a boat the size of a tinnie with a sail attached to it. I sit in the middle to keep it balanced and my boyfriend sits behind me steering and telling me when to move so I don’t get hit by the sail. Well anyway the wind was blowing and we saw dolphins right next to us, we stopped at one of the islands and had a swim, it was beautiful but all I could think of was, when do I have to move, when do I have to pull the keel out so it doesn’t drag in the sand, what happens if I fall out, will I get hit on the head and be knocked unconscious?  Yes, even though I was fine and I can swim and I was actually enjoying it, for the life of me I could not relax.  I would practice my breathing and it would help for a little while but then I would feel myself tense up and my upper body would become stiff and sore.  This then leads into my body being in pain the next day.  Why??? I hate feeling this way, I should be relaxed, cruising along the water, wind in my hair, dolphins racing us.

Do you ever feel this way, when you are in a relaxing situation, but you just cannot relax?  I will continue to practice my breathing to calm down, but now I am starting to think (while I’m writing this) that it may have something to do with self-trust as well.

What do you think?


New Moon Rituals…

new moon
New Moon January 25 2020 Australia courtesy

I’m coming out of the “Woo Woo” closet tonight with the New Moon.  I have been studying all the things I was interested in as a kid and told that they were EVIL.  Now I am following my heart and accepting what resonates with me.  Astrology and the Energy of the Universe is so beautiful and it was used for working out when to plant seeds, when to harvest, when women would get their periods, navigation and so many other good things.

This New Moon is the first of the year and is a great time to set intentions for the year to come (plant seeds). Let go of the old and start the new, stop being afraid of what others think, there will always be Judges and most of the time they are the ones who say judging is a SIN.

One of my intentions this year is to be consistent with this blog and share what I am learning about myself.  Another is to become more familiar with the Moon, Stars and Planets and to learn from the PAST to have a fantastic PRESENT.

This year I will “pull my finger out” and do what I want and trust that everything will fall into place. Follow MY dreams and NOT the path of others. This is MY life and in order to be HAPPY, I need to LIVE it.

Be ready to read about Astrology, the Tarot, Past Lives, Crystals and Spiritual Healing.

Now use this New Moon to release any old beliefs that don’t serve you anymore, forgive yourself and others and set New intentions for 2020.  If you have crystals pop them outside in the moonlight or on your windowsill to get energized.


Forgiving & Releasing – A Clean Slate…

I forgive myself for not forgiving and releasing things that no longer or ever served me well.

I forgive myself for not being confident enough to continue writing how I felt (truthfully).

I forgive myself for not realizing that I needed to write as a creative outlet to release my fears and not only help myself but others as well.

I forgive myself for being afraid of being my TRUE self and worrying about the judgement I may receive for following a “different” path.

I release all the old beliefs I held on for so long, ancestral, parental, religious, peer, social. All those beliefs that never made me feel safe and secure but only brought fear and guilt and lies. I release those and the bad feelings I had towards those I blindly followed.

I will no longer have the conflict and fights inside my head over what is deemed wrong or right, but choose only what is right for me and me only.  I choose love over fear, love for my mind, body and soul.  My soul will achieve the promise it made when it chose my body to fulfill this part of its life journey.

I am willing to release old negative beliefs.

They are only thoughts that stand in my way.

My new thoughts are positive and fulfilling. 

Louise Hay


I need to stand up for myself & notice when I’m being disrespected…

My choices in life have led me to allow others to disrespect me. I’ve allowed it and just stopped noticing when it is happening. So then I don’t stop it from happening and it just keeps continuing.

How did I find out I was being disrespected? I told my man some things that were said to me (that I thought were funny ). When he heard what people were saying to me he could not believe that I would let people disrespect me like that.

I was confused at first, thinking these people were just being silly, just Aussie larrikins, didn’t really mean what they were saying…

But, when I took time to think about it , I was shocked to see that people don’t respect me as a mature respectable woman.

Of course, a lot of this behavior is because of my own behavior in the past. During my last relationship (mental and physical abuse) I would try to cover up what was happening at home by over exaggerating my love life to somehow make others think I had this amazing relationship and exciting intimacy.

This was my mistake!!!

Some people only remember me this way because they haven’t seen me since my life has changed. Not their fault… but I have changed and I need to set them straight if they speak to me in a disrespectful way.

Trying to be someone I’m not has backfired… so much so , some people still treat me like the fake I was.

Unfortunately, I still don’t know who I am. But I sure know who I’m not.


Many of my friends know what I went through and know how I’ve changed over the last 2 years and have seen me grow and mature and slowly move on from my nightmare. They never bring up things from my past or think it’s funny to mention embarrassing things I may have said or done. My real friends respect me.

Still in discovery mode…

E. x

I’m still alive

Oh it has been a while…

Since my last post I have been away on holidays with my man. We went to France for 3 weeks, 1 week in Paris and 2 weeks driving the Normandy coast.

My man educated me on all the D-Day events and I got to see exactly what those brave men encountered in WWII.

There were times of stress and sadness and anxiety during the holiday but all turned out well.

I haven’t felt the need to see my therapist lately, I’m finding ways to cope with different stresses in my life.

I’m doing so much better than just a few months ago.


It’s been a long time…

Hi everyone, I'm sorry it's been so long since my last post.
Since then things have gone downhill, I've been very moody, depressed, strange, tired, confused, anxious, snappy and just plain unhappy 😔.
Turns out going off the contraceptive pill can do this (wish the dr had mentioned it). It's been 3 very long months of bickering and arguing with my loved ones.
I decided yesterday to see if it could be the side effects of going off the pill and low and behold I found a forum of 81 pages of women going through similar symptoms as I have and still am.
Now I know I'm feeling a little better and there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Many women say it takes about 6-8 months to get back to "normal ".
Upside: I'm off to France tomorrow morning with my love (hopefully still loves me at the end of this holiday). It's been very hard on him ( I'm sorry 😐).
Note to self… Eve you are going back to a city you love ❤️ be HAPPY 😊.